Finding Hope Read online

  “Katlyn’s first novel, Finding Hope, sees a path to redemption for the town alcoholic, Ethan Grey. Her words bring to life a love story worth reading from cover to cover. You will find yourself laughing and crying along with the characters in this book.”

  - Tiffany Campbell, Texas Mother of Two

  “Katlyn Grace writes with a very gentle but poignant spirit. In Finding Hope, Ethan Grey is a very broken person, and Katlyn managed to keep his character a wonderful and caring hero, despite his struggles. I can’t wait to read the upcoming books in The Lawson Series!”

  - Cleopatra Margot, Author of the Faith to Love Series

  “Finding Hope is beautifully written. Katlyn Grace writes with elegance and spirit. Ethan is a lost soul who needs help. Hope is a baker with a spiritual purpose in mind for him. God has a plan for them both.”

  - Tawnya Hanna, Homeschool Mother of Two

  “Finding Hope kept me on the edge of my seat from the very first sentence to the last. This novel is truly an inspiring love story centered around faith, strength, and hope. Can’t wait for more!”

  - Adison Woods, Wesleyan College Student

  “I couldn’t turn the pages in Finding Hope fast enough. This story was packed full of faith, flavor, and fun. Katlyn Grace did a marvelous job at proving there is hope for anyone. I can’t wait for the rest of The Lawson Series to come out!”

  - Charity Faith, Abeka Homeschool Student and Owner of @CharityFaithBakes Instagram

  Finding

  Hope

  Katlyn Grace

  Publisher’s note: This is a work of fiction. The characters, incidents, and dialogues are products of the author’s imagination and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  Finding Hope

  Copyright © 2019 by Katlyn Grace

  ISBN: 9781699804537

  Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are from:

  King James Version Bible

  © 1611

  ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

  No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any other form or in any means – by electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise – without prior written permission.

  dedication

  This book is dedicated to my parents. I would not be here if it was not for their continuous love and support. All my love goes out to their special hearts. Thank you for everything, Mom and Dad.

  “…hope we have as an anchor of the soul…”

  Hebrews 6:19

  prologue

  H e downed one last shot of whisky and straightened his spine. His sister’s words still rang in his ears. You are what people would call hopeless, Ethan. You’re hopeless.

  It stung. He was letting her down and he knew it. Ethan was letting himself down, but he was too far in now. His sister had been right…there was no hope for him. Even if he tried, he’d never be the person he used to be—before the alcohol. Before all the pain.

  He tipped the bartender ever so generously and stumbled out into the brisk, chilly night. The dark resembled his insides. He felt alone tonight. Alone and depressed. It had been exactly three years since his parents died in that horrific car accident. It also had been three years since Ethan was sober enough to carry along a conversation and awake enough to even know what was going on around him.

  How had his life gotten this low? It was miserable. He was doing everything he knew was wrong, yet never strained himself to fix it.

  But no. There was no point in trying to fix something that shattered into a million pieces three years ago. He already lost his family. His sister practically disowned him after last night. What did he have to live for?

  Nothing, he believed, absolutely nothing.

  one

  “M ark’s message was absolutely beautiful yesterday.” Hope flashed back to the sermon her older brother had preached for Sunday morning church service.

  She rolled another piece of fondant out and cut it into squares. Waiting on God. It was a subject so dear to her, and her brother seemed to touch the very heart of it. Song of Solomon 2:7, “I charge you, O ye daughters of Jerusalem, by the roes, and by the hinds of the field, that ye stir not up, nor awake my love, till he please.” She’d been repeating the scripture in her head constantly ever since her brother preached on it.

  None of Hope’s past relationships had been a smooth sail, to say the least. She always thought it was the timing that had been bad, but maybe it was the fact that she hadn’t ever waited on God. She always felt the need to rush and take the chance if an opportunity was presented. She never gave God room for what He thought was best.

  After Mark’s sermon, Hope decided to alter her narrow point of view. There was no room for her to straddle the fence between what she thought and what God thought. God’s plans would surely give her the best results. So, she decided to wait on Him. There was no better relief than to solely place her future in the hands of an all-knowing God.

  “It was. Mark has grown so much in the ministry over the past couple of months. God has something special planned for him,” Hope’s younger sister and best friend, Brianna, replied with a beam spread across her face.

  “Considering he’s not running over anyone’s toes with his battery-operated Mustang anymore, I’d say he has matured.” Hope giggled at the childhood memory. As a kid, Mark never failed to show off for the ladies in his sleek little black Mustang. Hope just always happened to be in the way when her smooth big brother did so.

  “Oh, memories.” Brianna sighed with a laugh. “Do you want me to start boxing the sugar cookies for the Richmond’s birthday party?” Bri asked her sister as she pointed to the blue Superman cookies.

  “Pretty please with a cherry on top.” Hope batted her long eyelashes as Brianna maneuvered her way through the kitchen toward the boxes.

  “You’re pathetic,” Bri teased as Hope laughed at how she always managed to sweet talk her little sister into boxing all the goodies.

  They went back to work in a peaceful silence, or at least as quiet as their bakery kitchen could get. Refrigerators hummed, and timers buzzed. Brianna boxed desserts and Hope decorated a gorgeous wedding cake. She added various shades of mint colored flowers to cascade down the right side of the white three-tiered cake.

  Anne, who worked the counter at Hope and Bri’s café and bakery, pushed open the swinging doors that separated the café from the kitchen. “Hope, he’s out there again.” She barely spoke above a hushed whisper.

  Hope wasn’t surprised. The town drunk was there just about every morning, always hungover.

  She quickly wiped off her hands on a towel. “Anne, if you wouldn’t care to help Bri finish boxing those cookies, I can handle the counter for now.” She smiled and pulled off her polka dotted apron and pushed through the doors that lead to the café part of her bakery.

  Funfetti Café and Bakery was surprisingly quiet for eight o’clock in the morning. They were normally swamped at this hour for scones, coffee, muffins—all the breakfast essentials.

  She scanned the room. Two business looking men discussed something at a booth in the corner, and a father and his child shared a fresh cinnamon roll by the wide floor to ceiling windows. Glancing toward the bar stools near the display case, she spotted him. In the same seat he always sat in. Hunched over, with his left hand holding his head up. His soft, brown curls weren’t long, but they still framed the sides of his face, and his green eyes were hazy.

  Ethan Grey.

  She swore if this man wasn’t the alcoholic that he was, she would be interested in him. Hope wasn’t going to deny the fact that with a little cleaning up—including shaving—Ethan wouldn’t be that bad looking
of a guy. To be frank, he didn’t even look terrible now. Plus, he was wealthy too, but money didn’t solve all problems. He needed to get in church and put God first, then maybe she’d consider it.

  Hope mentally kicked herself for even thinking about such things. As gut-wrenching as it was, she knew this man was far from any of that. He was quite the opposite of what she looked for in a guy.

  Ethan’s heavy breathing alarmed Hope, but she tried to look past it. “What can I get you this morning, Ethan?” She brushed her bangs out of her face.

  “The usual,” he replied, taking off his leather jacket and setting it on the barstool next to him.

  Hope nodded and headed to the display counter showcasing all Funfetti Café and Bakery’s delicious goodies. She pulled out a double chocolate chip muffin, wrapped it in a fancy brown paper, and slid it across the counter to him. She then proceeded to pour out a fresh cup of black coffee, adding no cream or sugar. Strong. She knew this man like the back of her hand now…at least his orders anyway.

  “Thanks.” He nodded at her as he handed over cash, already knowing the amount before she could say anything. He ordered the same thing every morning.

  Hope saw the desperation in Ethan’s stormy eyes. It was as if they were screaming, “Help me, I’m desperate.” Hope could physically see how miserable he looked. Something pulled at her heartstrings and she found herself wanting to talk to him, to discover the reason why, and help him with his addiction. She couldn’t help it, that was the type of person she was. She wanted others to know that there was hope.

  She kept herself occupied behind the counter by putting on fresh pots of coffee, refilling the donut section, and wiping down the white marble countertops.

  “It’s awful gloomy outside today.” Ethan’s voice surprised her. He was trying to make small talk with her.

  She glanced out the windows, catching a glimpse of the dark, puffy clouds. It had been sunny when she had left her apartment. Now the rain was slashing down. “Yes, it is.” She glanced back at Ethan. Fine lines defined a frown at the corners of his mouth. Tear stained cheeks had his face looking a bit red this morning. His dark and weary eyes met Hope’s. He wanted to talk, and she wanted more than anything to see him smile.

  She sighed and took a seat opposite of him on a barstool at her side of the counter. “So, you’ve been coming here for about two and a half years almost every morning.” Hope paused to make sure she had his attention. “Are my muffins just that good or what?”

  His lips curled into a small smile. A tiny dimple formed at the crook of his mouth that Hope had never noticed before. “Your bakery is a great way to start the day.” He took a sip of his coffee. “Although, I think I am going to have to discover a new muffin flavor. After three years of double chocolate chip, it’s not that special anymore.”

  Hope grinned. Keep him talking, she told herself.

  “Are you sure you don’t want to change up your coffee order either? We even have a butter pecan flavoring now,” she teased him. Black coffee was just nasty. Hope at least needed a splash of milk and a dash of sugar to even consider drinking it.

  He chuckled at her remark. “There’s nothing like a good ole cup of strong joe.”

  Hope relaxed. Ethan wasn’t as intimidating as she thought. She suddenly wanted to know more about him, like what made him an alcoholic, what his reasons were behind his actions. Those would be questions for another time, though. She didn’t want to scare him off first thing.

  “Tell you what, tomorrow morning when you come, I’ll have a whole lineup of muffins for you to sample. You can pick out your next muffin to eat for the upcoming two and a half years,” she offered with a smile. She knew generosity would be the only way to open this guy’s heart, and she planned on doing just that.

  His eyes that were once dull, sparkled for a moment. Hope was delighted to see a rare smile like that on his face. “Count me in,” he replied, wrapping his fingers around his warm mug.

  “Good. My sister and I will be here at six in the morning to start prepping. Be here thirty minutes after, and I’ll let you in early.” Hope hopped off the barstool at the sound of her sister calling her through the kitchen doors.

  “Sounds like work is calling you.” He seemed amused as he took another swig of coffee.

  “It’s never ending around here.” Hope grabbed a muffin for herself from the display case. “Nice to chat with you, Ethan.” She disappeared through the double doors and went back to work.

  The rest of her day flew by and before Hope knew it, she was back in her apartment.

  It was a snug apartment. The only rooms that were hidden behind walls were her bedroom and bathroom, creating an open floor plan that made her apartment seem bigger than it was. Hope tried for the most part to stay neat. Although, she was a sucker for new pillows. Where there was a place for one, she most certainly had a fun, decorative pillow. Her kitchen was the biggest and most used area in her apartment by far. She accented her airy white colored rooms with plenty of pastel colors. Her apartment was…girly, very girly.

  The clock on the microwave in her kitchen told her it was 6:00 P.M. Her brother, Mark, had promised to come over this evening and grill steaks for the two of them. It was nice having a big brother who protected and genuinely cared for her. He was a police chief, therefore protecting was his job, but being an older brother to two sisters took that job to another level. Bri and Hope were dear to him, and he always made sure to show that through his actions and words.

  Hope smiled at the thought of him. She was incredibly blessed.

  She set the cardboard box of leftover cupcakes from her bakery on the counter for the two of them to devour after dinner. There was no way they were eating dinner without dessert. She figured Mark’s gigantic sweet tooth would appreciate that.

  Hope placed garlic and parmesan crusted potatoes in the oven to bake, then headed to the shower to clean up. She wouldn’t dare eat dinner with flour and fondant caked in her hair and on her clothes. She picked at a clump of crusty buttercream icing on her shirt. She found that Mondays were the busiest cake making and decorating days, also the messiest. She giggled at the sight of herself in the mirror. She was an absolute mess. There was no way Mark was seeing her like this, for she’d never hear the end of his teasing.

  Mark had come over an hour later after Hope had finished blow drying her hair. Dinner was delicious, but mostly eaten in silence, as they were both starved.

  They were now settled on the couch to watch the Chicago Bears play the Pittsburg Steelers. It was the third quarter and the Steelers were beating the Bears to a pulp. The disgusted look on Mark’s face said it all. Hope had to admit; it was awful to see their own team losing.

  “I can’t even bare to watch this.” He turned the volume down on the television. “Want another cupcake?” He gestured toward the seven cupcakes left in the box as he took one, leaving only six.

  Hope snarled her nose and shook her head, declining the offer. “I don’t know where you’re putting room for all of those cupcakes. Especially after eating steak, potatoes, and veggies.” Hope had only eaten one and a half cupcakes, so that left Mark to have already eaten three, working on his fourth. She silently chuckled.

  “Cupcakes are your specialty, especially these banana cream filled ones. You have stepped up your game, Sista.” He took another bite of the cupcake. “I might have to stop by and grab a dozen for the guys back at work tomorrow morning. They’ll go crazy over them.”

  “Free cupcakes, who wouldn’t love them?” Hope laughed. “Speaking of tomorrow…Ethan Grey. Do you know him?” She bit her lip, wondering if she was crazy to even bother bringing the subject up.

  Her brother quirked an eyebrow at Ethan’s name. “I think everyone knows Alton, Illinois’ town drunk.” He grabbed another cupcake. “Why?”

  “He normally comes to the shop every morning, hungover, but never says a word. Today, he started a conversation with me.”

  The color drained from her brother�
�s face and he sat his cupcake back down. “What did he do?” Hope watched Mark switch into big brother protector mode.

  “Nothing, I promise,” she answered. Instant relief washed over Mark’s face. “I could just see the desperation in his eyes, though. Everything about him screamed help, like there was a better person inside of him just begging to crawl out. So, I offered to let him sample some muffins tomorrow morning as an excuse to possibly get to know him better. A way to see a reason through his actions.”

  Mark nodded, knowing that this was the kind of person that Hope was. She saw hope where others didn’t. He told her earlier that he was beginning to see the significance of her name with her personality. “I just want you to be careful and listen to whatever God tells you to do. In the book of Colossians, it says to put on kindness, humbleness of mind, and so on, but above all, charity. You never know, what you do or say might just lead him to God.

  “People like Ethan aren’t just alcoholics. There’s more to his story, whether it be anger raging inside of him, sadness, or a family issue. Maybe he even feels alone and depressed.” Mark turned to face her, his big brown eyes making direct contact with her green ones. “Hope, you’re good at seeing the best in others, I’ve noticed that a lot recently. Take the talent that God’s given you and put it to beneficial use.”

  She blushed at his compliment, “Thank you, Mark.” She grabbed blankets for the two of them and wrapped herself in one.

  “I think God’s pretty pleased with you,” she mentioned, grabbing Mark’s attention.

  “I’d like to think so, but why you mention it?” He shifted his attention from the football game to her.

  “Bri and I had to drop off some cookies for Billy Richmond’s birthday. He turned eight today. You know who he said he wanted to be like when he grew up?” She asked him with a grin.